Lord, Bless This Mess!

A couple of weeks ago, my sister sent me a text with this picture.  She had found the sign at a local craft store, and wanted it for her house. Being a mother of three boys, she was so thankful it said mess instead of house.  I smiled.  I could understand where she was coming from. After all, we shared a room growing up. But, as her older sister and a mother of two girls, I couldn’t help but think (a bit condescendingly), I’d never want that up in my home.

At our house, the Golden rule is “Don’t make a mess!” Because everyone knows that when there is a mess, Mommy turns into Sergeant Mommy.  It comes over me like in Jekyll and Hyde.  I get tunnel vision. My heart begins to race.  My blood pressure rises. All I can focus on is getting rid of the mess and Lord help the person who made it.

Granted, I make messes, too, and when I do, it’s almost more traumatic. Because at least when there is someone else to blame, I have some way of releasing the tension. When I’ve made the mess, well…it’s just sad! Like the time I dropped an entire jar of mayonnaise on our kitchen floor.  It’s hard to pick up glass and wipe up grease through tears!

But, messes are part of life. Recently, my family and I were attending a picnic at someone’s house.  As I was busy chatting with new friends at a table, my youngest walked up and interrupted to say she had spilled her soda all over the table she was sitting at.  I could feel the blood rising, but calmly (we were in public, after all) I walked over to her table.  She was busy telling me it had been an accident.  The little girl sitting next to her heard her and said, “Don’t worry! Accidents happen!” And at that moment, I wished I were she.  I wished I could espouse similar wisdom to my children, instead of berating them and myself when accidents happen.  Because accidents and messes are a part of life, and pretending they aren’t, hiding them when people come over, keeping them behind closed doors, doesn’t make them go away.

If I’m honest with myself, one of my greatest fears is feeling like I’m not in control.  That’s why my mantra for so many years, especially while living overseas, has been “Fake it ‘til you make it!” I want other people to see me as a person who has it all together, and I work hard to keep up that appearance.  But as Benner says, “The bondage of any false self is the bondage of having to keep up the illusion.” It’s exhausting, and because I’m too busy nitpicking, I’m less compassionate or patient or kind or gentle than I want to be.  I am a hot mess!  

Like the rich young ruler, Christ is asking me to give up the thing that is of most value to me, my need for control. And some days, I ignore His calling.  I’m too busy trying to clean up the messes in my life to see that He is wanting to offer me something better.  I may have learned to compulsively clean up (literally & figuratively) in order to survive, but survival isn’t what God wants to offer me.  He wants to set me free from my self-imposed taskmaster. 

I guess I need that sign up in my house more than my sister does to remind me of God’s invitation and His grace.

Lord, please bless this mess!

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What parts of your life do you see as “messes” that you might be hiding under some rug? What is God asking you to give up in order to receive His glory? What mantras might you be living by that are keeping you from accepting His invitation today?

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